'The Last Meeting of IPMS Ragwing'

[StephenLawson]

Dear forumites what follows is the most tragic example of Advanced Modelers Syndrome (AMS.) *I just found this article in our local Newspaper. *A local UPS driver made his usual stop at a home in a Denver suburb. *He noticed that there was a mountain of previous deliveries stacked outside the adjoining garage. *The driver also heard the sound of growling of a small canine in the garage. *Fearing the worst he called the local police, fire & rescue and animal control. *When they opened the garage the grisly sight before them was too bizarre for the local TV news people to broadcast. *BE WARNED AMS IS DANGEROUS!*I can hardly bear it * *

[StephenLawson]

Oh! the humanity...

That is just TOO wonderfull

[NeilE]

Stephen;

unfortunately this sort of thing is all too common. Why just the other day here an old derelict model shop which was due for demolition was opened up and the skeletons of five missing modellers were found grouped around a model of a well known Mongolian Quadriplane - forensic experts have indicated they believe that the five either killed each or died of starvation arguing over the finish of this enigmatic aircraft.

Sometimes The Institute (of dear beloved memory) picked up derelict modellers in the final throes of AMS wandering the streets clutching (for example) a resin conversion set, muttering plaintively "it doesn't fit, it doesn't fit"

Fortunately we were able to rehabilitate most of them but a few poor souls were consigned to the Back Wards as being beyond hope (God knows what the Very Very Small Parts Corporation is doing to them now. >

As an interesting aside, Sir Henry Adelbert Hawk, that well known aristocratic amateur archeologist, (and friend of the Good Herr Doktor Von Humbrol) discovered, while excavating at the tomb of Pharoh Testor-Amun, a group of skeletal Egyptians grouped around what looked like a scale model of Klaatu. Unfortunately little more is known as Sir Henry was killed shortly after when his compressor exploded during a particularly long spray job. Some say it was the curse of Testoramen that was responsible. others a blocked hose - who can tell?

All the Best

Neil

Increasingly distressed at the sight of so many shambling wrecks wandering the streets furtively fingering the contents of kit boxes concealed in sleazy brown paper bags, the slight figure of the Dowager Duchess v'Odtka und Töenig is found most days barring the doorway of Dzerkov Toys and Hobbies (discression assured). Her zeal is to be commended but I fear her suggestion that Nigel Hannant should be deposed under threat of a nuclear strike against Lowestoft is a bit of a none starter.

[stringbags4ever2]

I am rolling on the ground LMFAO!!!!! Tears are streaming down my face. OH MY GAWWWWWDDD!! 8)

[Michael]

It's true that modellers have more fun (balsa flies better as well). Especially more fun than the tortured souls who haunt the Off Topic section. As any artilleryman will tell you, the bigger the gun, the bigger the bore.

But as Elton John reminds us (speaking of AMS)

"It'll take you a couple of v'Odtka und Töenigs
To set you on your feet again."

[vince14]

I've had to deal with the fiery Duchess on many occasions - her ingenuity in stopping those lost souls from crossing the boundary into Hannants is legendary. Still, she can't stop me!

BTW, last time I was in Lowestoft Nigel had a couple of (real!) Harriers in his warehouse - A GR.3 and a Sea Harrier, if I remember correctly. I wonder, is he now stockpiling weapons of mass destruction?

[StephenLawson]

Harrier? what's a Harrier? It can't be an aircraft... :

[BobE]

Stephen, That is absolutely outrageous!! *Now that we have all had a good laugh how about giving us a few clues unless you feel it will destroy the impact. What are some of the ingredients in that diorama? Scale? The Snipe certainly appears to be a stick and tissue model. Did you have that many old models to sacrifice for this diorama? You must have turned out more (and obviously better) models than I could in ten more lifetimes!! :
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Bob E